Over 2 months ago I wrote the last post. It feels like it was a year ago.

Today, I’m without my girlfriend of 9.5 years. We parted ways quite abruptly yet calmly. At the time it felt like it was mutual like I also had enough. I didn’t. I miss everything about her. She was what I would consider love of my life and the best thing that ever happened to me. She had everything I wanted and needed. I didn’t take it. I didn’t give back. I wasn’t there. I just wish I allowed the love in. I didn’t know how. I don’t know anymore. I consider myself easy going but with her I wasn’t. Small thing might have felt like a rejection. I kept scanning for threats and I was finding them. She said to look for love. I tried. Dissociation? Maybe. My mind was playing tricks on me for sure. Too much ego? For sure. Relying on myself drove me into the ground. She’s been an inspiration to me, life companion, my future and my past. But somehow somewhere she stopped being my present.

I could analyze it over a million different ways… accumulated hurt, pleasing each other, losing ourselves in the relationship, my shame? The worst of it all is that our last week together was amazing. It felt like a potential for what it could have been all along. Pressure to perform disappeared. It felt like a cloud was lifted. I felt love, support, present moment. I wish the world stopped spinning and that period lasted forever…

When things failed she tried to make a positive spin on things asking what is there to learn?

There are a lot of lessons for me:

1. You don’t know what you have until you lose it. I recall some old management book from university where it said that in Japan after someone makes a big mistake they can actually sometimes be promoted. I’m not sure if that’s true. But now I understand. They wouldn’t make the same mistake again.
2. I don’t know who I am. I’m putting everything into question right now and starting from zero. I’m willing to rediscover who I am, what I want. .
3. Allow others in. I’m 39 and I’ve been influenced by my family, culture and male construct to be self-reliant. I took it way too far. Hype independent. Everything alone and push people away. I see it now how alienating it has been and detrimental to me, my life, my mental health.
4. Be aware of your destructive tendencies. I thought I wanted to be trading and wanted to be trading longer. I didn’t even wanted to be making money. I didn’t have a goal, really. I just enjoyed the stimulation, complexity, tension as perhaps it reminded me of home. There was something soothing about it. I didn’t realize how bad it was until I stopped. I don’t play PC games, mobile games cause I get addicted – they’ve been leaving me empty. I stopped drinking alcohol and smoking weed cause I realize I regret it later. But with stock market somehow it felt productive and I missed it… it felt like it covers my shame but looking back it was deepening it.
5. Realize what’s important. This summer I had a pleasure to experience life of families of close friends. It was a pleasure to be around that, in that, experience that. I’ve been thinking why didn’t I see that before? It just felt like this is what’s life about. It just felt so good to be around kids, families, unstructured time. I saw three generations of single family performing a song at a camping site in a ‘talent show’. There was the grandmother, her kids and grandkids and I was thinking that they don’t even know how beautiful it is and how lucky they are. There was so much joy. I’m even crying writing about this as I recall the exact moment. I don’t know what it means exactly but perhaps that deep down there that’s what I want. I can see a life that’s fulfilling if I had that. And I would feel like I missed out on life if I didn’t.
6. Seek help. I’ve been rejecting the notion that I need help. Why would I? If I can do it all by myself? Letting others in is one thing, but actively seeking help is another. Perhaps I could do it all by myself but there’s a risk I couldn’t and it would take me longer. I’m 39 and it’s time.
7. Realize grief comes in cycles. I cry over my ex, over what it could have been, over mistakes I made, over the pain I caused her and myself. And then I stop. And then it comes back and then I cry some more. It comes and it goes.

What’s next for me?

I visited a therapist yesterday specializing in CPTSD who does IFS (Internal Family Systems). He suggested I take test for ADHD. I’m pretty sure it will say that I have ADHD even though I don’t want to have it. But the therapist made sense in saying that in order to work with IFS it would be beneficial to him (and me) knowing what tendencies of mine come from trauma and which are from CPTSD. That part made sense to me (at least in theory). In addition, I could take meds if I wanted to potentially. I’ve been toying with the idea of trying it for few years now. I’m mixed about it. Some parts of me say ‘fuck that; you are who you are; don’t give money to big pharma; you’re stronger and you don’t need that’. And yet other parts that are coming up lately post break up say ‘it’s okay to feel better; it’s okay to try things; it doesn’t define you; why not?’.

So I’ll do the ADHD test and I’m doing a casting for therapist(s). I have some consultation calls, doing some research etc., and trying to find something and someone who would help me. During one of the consultation calls I was asked how would I know that I’m getting better? I don’t remember exactly what I said but that’s a good question and here are the answers:

1. Feeling positive emotions and ability to give them back. I think that’s the most important for me cause the most shattering thing in my previous relationship was that I couldn’t give receive and give love. Just writing this sentence made me go to bed and cry in my crying towel… I’m able to feel anxiety, stress, fear quite easily but positive emotions? That’s rare. But yes, my partner was trying to give so much to me and I was telling her that I probably capture 5-10% of it. That was my estimate. I saw the love in her eyes, I saw it in her, I felt some of it but it’s like I just couldn’t take it in. I couldn’t absorb it. I couldn’t open my heart? I don’t know. What I know is that I want to be able to take in 100% because I know it exists, I know what it felt like to have that 5-10% and I can’t even imagine what it feels like to have it all. And I also know that If I can’t feel positive emotions as much then I don’t really have a chance for a successful and fulfilling relationship.
2. Comfort with intense emotions. Another thing that killed my relationship is that my ex partner said she couldn’t be herself around me. God that hurts… it’s like she molded herself to accommodate me, my moods cause otherwise I’d dim her somehow. I expressed once that she was ‘too much’ or ‘too hyper’. Instead of cherishing her amazing personality, who she is and being grateful to be with her I was feeling threatened by it. It was causing me some level of stress, anxiety – perhaps cause it’s uncontrollable? Like I can’t predict where it’s going to go? Does this come from home being too tense? I don’t know why and how but it pains me deeply that in subtle ways which I wasn’t aware of until recently I was just chipping away at her and her authentic expression. And in the end, the version she was around me (more calm, accommodating, sweet) wasn’t entirely fake but it wasn’t what she was truly feeling in that moment. I remember her being excited about something and I felt like it’s too much to my system so she had to tune in down. I want to be around all emotions and not feel threatened by them and especially I don’t want others to change around me.
3. Being authentic. I feel like I’m just not authentic. I remember first day of school and how awful it felt to be sitting in that f chair, being bored, feeling restless, disconnected and not knowing what the f is happening and why. And little by little I was doing less in life and becoming a smaller version of myself. I learned how to adapt, please others, say what I think others want to hear. I just felt like I had to adapt and not be myself to be accepted and maybe loved? In that process I lost myself I feel. Some parts prevailed but joy got killed. I killed my expression (that was killed looong time ago). I want those back! Even if I’m by myself I feel contained. I don’t feel free. So wtf? What’s stopping me?

It feels now a little lighter on my chest; like this post and effort has been worthwhile. It sits just right in me.

I’ve been thinking what’s the ‘bold’ thing is in the blackboldcat. I thought it would be about making bold bets. And maybe it can be. But I think it’s as bold or even bolder to be yourself and share your feelings, doubts, fears. Lately I’ve been feeling and thinking like I missed a chance for a fulfilling life with what I consider to be my soul mate. Sometimes it feels like I fucked it all up. But for a moment now it feels peaceful and okay.

Good news is that I didn’t smoke for last 4 months. Bad news is that I smoked 20 mins ago. Oh well. I want to use this time a bit for reflection.

Here I am, trying to make money as a trader. Reality is that I should follow a system, I know I should follow it and yet I’m still hesitant, fearful of that. I’ve been doing lots of IFS self-therapy and even developed an app for myself to input daily sentence completion (on self-esteem and others). Some of it on IFS i.e. which parts are active, what to do etc.,

For daily priorities, I even came up with a pyramid just as a remainder as to what’s most important.

And if someone like me has things to address things on a personal level, there’s unfortunately some inner work to do and it takes time. But it’s possible to front-load that effort with self-reflection, more self-awareness, perhaps some bigger inner personal shifts. The goal is not to be affected with past experiences which might have affected us negatively in how to become a consistently profitable trader. Basically, the greater self-awareness and less stupid stuff we do the greater the ROI. So I started putting maybe 20 mins a day of morning reflection and sentence completion to sort of navigate and focus properly for the day to come. But this requires asking myself how I feel and possibly reducing any feelings that might affect me negatively during the day. It’s a good ROI to clear the head and re-inforce some things consciously by thinking about them at the beginning of each trading day.

I don’t want to think what I did last four months but it would also be a nice memoir. Some thing top of my head

1. Started using Windsurf IDE and stopped using Pycharm. All new code I create is by using Windsurf IDE. I have more brain capacity for trading when I use it less for coding. Instead, it’s more like being a project manager.
2. Deployed first apps to Render
3. Started using Cloudflare and buckets for the first time
4. Started moving postgres to cloud
5. Re-created an app for managing tickers on which I analyze stocks for 1.5h a day
6. Deployed app for getting alerts from tradingview to my database so it can feed live HTML dashboards with all alerts with 1 sec delay with additional data from my locally hosted postgres db via SSH
7. Split IBKR account into
8. Made good calls on gold, silver, some stocks, unh knife catch, Overall up
9. Experimented with a straddle for first time
10. Missed out on the VIX spike coz I was totally focused on reflecting and was out of markets…
11. Learned a lot from recent trades
12. Enjoys this path
13. Stopped drinking alcohol also. Didn’t drink since last post
14. Realized that I was going to gym to escape feeling of fear. I trained too much and was tired and was putting too much focus into it with diet, 3x hard training a week, run 2x.
15. Realized I feel much better doing trainings 2x a week in gym and supplement with 1x run up hill and zone 2 for 30-45 mins few times a week. I also do HIIT once or twice a week. Basically, 2 exercises Monday to Friday.
16. Started doing sauna 3-4x a week

Anyways, things are overall better. I know what to focus on and I’m getting there.

I realized in the gym that I’m just not strong and I won’t be. Yea, maybe if I really train for example squats 2-3x per week. Cause last time I did it I worked it up to 115kg 5×5 but then after xmas and a break I couldn’t get back to it. Maybe it was a 2 week break? And then doing squats 100kg 5×5 I can barely do it. Since I don’t want to be training squats 2-3x per week (and I’ve been losing weight lately) then there’s really no point. Of course I could train more etc., but it’s just not worth it. So it’s not that I can’t be strong but I won’t be because I decided that it’s not worth it. Also, I never really felt good in squats with my long femur to torso ratio. Deadlift sumo feels ok, I like it. Bench I don’t do cause I maybe topped out at up to 80kg 5×5 and then again break, didn’t come back to it not training bench 2-3x per week. I guess I just don’t enjoy training without results, really. If numbers were going up I’d keep on. Ok, enough… I guess my point is that I should focus on something I like and put myself in a position of strength and not weakness. And day trading open is my weakness and swing trading my potential strength. There. I didn’t have to write about the whole gym to say that. Hope you enjoyed!

Well, truth is I’ve been gambling. There’s a lot on my chest and this week I felt like going to bed and crying. Eventually, I didn’t. I kept on trying to be focused on using my daily process list i.e. wake up, some exercise, cold exposure, shower, meditation and start working with 45 mins of waking up. And then (and this is new) my process this week (after establishing it) was basically about putting in what I’ve been doing until now but without really having a plan and checkmarking it as day goes along. Without having a plan that’s written down I didn’t give myself opportunity to critically think about what I’ve been doing and does it make sense? Well, I’ve given myself the opportunity just yesterday (after following daily checklist plan that’s printed out) and I realized that what I’ve been doing was -EV speaking delicately, and more like gambling really. The funny thing is, that if I checked my trades I would have known that/discovered that earlier. But I was too much of a pussy to do that and face the truth. Now, it’s not so bad because there are trades that made me money but those are trades on which I spend less time, think about them less and oversee less cause I just let them ride. But where I lose money comes after a process where I check ~200 stocks daily and then categorize them based on what I see from 1-2 charts quickly if there’s an opportunity during upcoming trading session. Make sense but:

1. I’ve been using same list without updating it for year/two? I mean, big tech was there etc., major stocks, tech, semis and many more categories and subcategories (dozens maybe). But I missed out on new things like quantum computing and the whole wave. Well, I just didn’t know about it lol; I was so much in my list bubble.
2. Not having backtested and or automated strategy. Like, I would get in at open
3. Too many trades. I would open 5-10 positions (at open mind you…) and set small SLs and get knocked out whereas trade could actually work out intraday
4. Not knowing fundamentals. Yea, I don’t check. I’m telling myself that I don’t have info, have to set API blah blah but I can also sign up to something like gurufocus or something and be able to scan something quickly based on some data, graphs and absorb in a 1 min. It’s like looking at charts which I did for some time (and it gets faster to read) and probably with financials the same.
5. Not updating my knowledge on the company. I just don’t read the news. I’m not sure why? I think waste of time? I should set a process to check it for 5 mins per trade and that’s it. And how I would use that time is up to me, but I set a timer and check around. And eventually, I’ll get a better solution overtime to check and improve.

Another thing that the money I make on trades is typically when having knowledge about company, market sentiment around it, technical analysis etc., and not when I just get cut on the open. And worst thing is that I had a trading list what positions to open. But instead, I looked at other tickers, jumped on them and lost money while the previous tickers were ‘unattended’ (if thats the word?).

I also don’t check and monitor entries. How I missed out for example with with BABA. I had the stock at good price level thinking that this is bottoming out and wanted to be long, but then mid Jan I got SL’ed (3%?) and never got back and missed 20-25% move and maybe some leverage options. What’s the lesson here? Correct watchlist and a process for monitoring entries where I filter a table daily. And in this case, I would be watching BABA and maybe 10-20 other stocked marked as ‘daily’ frequency to be displayed to the user basically every day, while the rest of the tickers (how many hundreds) can still be there but with greater frequency value i.e. to show to user every 7 or 14 or 28 days up to 365? Cause there’s no point for me to look at something that has been trading in a tight range daily EVERY SINGLE DAY. Right? And so, I won’t. Alert is set and that’s it. That info should be in table too. Ok…

And a cherry on top -> I’ve trading when I was high and losing money in the process. It was more exciting to gamble that way (who doesn’t like gambling and drugs?) but that’s not how I can make money (sad about it). So the only way I can do that is being sober, focused, organized and treating it like a profession. I simply cannot allow myself to miss out on a f stock that I think has potential to explode. I missed it? wtf? I wouldn’t rise in an organization as a trader if I missed out – then wtf am I doing, really? So… I need to pull myself together. Funny thing is that I’m high now (so much easier to bear the pain; not sure if I could do it sober to write about it). In my defense, thc/cbd helped me trade as well cause before I was paralyzed, full of fear. One of the best books I’ve recently read is six pillars of self-esteem and it was this month where I realized how my low self-esteem affects me, my trading etc., Now I’m reading “Mountain is you” which is about self-sabotage. I mean, if 1% makes it as traders, then it’s good to run on good hardware and so I’m addressing these issues i.e. working on self-responsbility/assertiveness and something else… keeping a log/journal. Honestly, shit works for self-esteem when I address all the bs I don’t wanna do first thing in the morning instead of putting it off and then thinking about it and feeling bad that I’m not doing. One time my boss said to me “You need to be on top of this” – and for some reason that just impacted me because deep inside I was afraid to be on top of shit and deal with people in direct, collaborate way but I also knew it’s the right way. Right now I want to be on top of ‘this’ where ‘this’ is bs nobody likes or like Mark Twain said ‘a frog’ to be eaten (eat frogs first thing in the morning – or sth like that).

Pfff… what else. Yes, I’m high but I’ll be coding and working on my platform. Yes. I built my platform from 0. I created a f process/system to follow daily and one of the points was to analyze all tickers via my application. I built it 3 days during last week. If I attempted this 2 years ago it would take me a year (coz I was a programming beginner and no AI to help). Ok. So, till next time I guess. Sober up, stop gambling, create and use platform that would provide stream of opportunities and take them in a swing trade manner and or key levels following events & volume. And react when alerts are received and/or actively look for entry positions for stocks I should be monitoring. That’s f it.

Don’t feel like writing anymore. bye bye

What does AI think? bye bye

Most of the positioned turned to be a loser. Looking back, some positions were even stupid to begin with.

And I guess I’m new to this. Reta

Maybe indeed I got fucked… or I fucked myself

Haha fml

I bet more than I’ve ever bet. Looking back half it makes sense and half is what I would call ‘a bet’. Total I can lose ~8% of total worth of market opens down and keeps going down. Some of those would be trading losses and some portfolio losses. I don’t have a hedge (wow, can’t believe I used this word). But yea, if you want to win you have to be willing to lose. I made a few plays and hope at least 1 will work out. If it does, it pays for all rest.

1. INTC – rumors that acquisition in play; something have to give; people jump on it; its’ been in the lows for some time already. It doesn’t seem to go down any lower recently. So? Well, there’s a higher chance of it going up much higher than it is to go lower. Plans might be revealed for INTC so let’s see. And it was long weekend so more rumors I thought. So I bet. Calls.
2. SLB – good results, interesting technical. If trumps says anything positive about oil drilling then I’m in the money tight. Was low IV and it might break out. Just reported earnings on Friday and street liked it. Media mentions SLB as AI play. Yea some segment of 10% revenue is now some digital services which is good – and can grow. So I agree it’s a good earnings play, technicals break out (weekly/monthly goes back 25 years that this is a strong resistance now). Let’s see. If it doesn’t go now, it should go later; got some longer dated calls too but primarily I’m counting for tomorrow.
3. BTC – got a sizable position. If we go higher from here and make new highs, I think it can really reach 200k – even this year. Market could go very sensitive and for every time Trump says ‘Bitcoin’ price could literally move 1% higher. Anyways, he’s got BTC and I don’t think he wants to lose it and see it lose value. So he’ll pump it one way or another – maybe real action or talking about action. Also, if he makes it easier for banks to own BTC then I’ll double down on calls following 6-18 months in IWM. Value of regional banks would go up coz more BTC is more assets and that would pump IWM while BTC would be going up. Great way to grow the economy in dollar terms while building risk into the system.
4. LAC – yea wanted to buy stock and bet big coz maybe bottom too for Lithium and chance of some gov involvement to push LAC higher
5. NFE – calls/stock; play on gas
6. AMAT – nice breakout; might continue; some deal might get announced

So I covered gas, oil, btc, lithium bottom, intel bottom, gold. Basically, what I tried to do is:

1. Understand themes of Trump and what can be said, rumored etc, and thus be affected
2. Look at technicals if they’re good or ready to go
3. Try to find bottomed out themes that might be in turnaround
4. Low IV (AMAT, SLB) so cheap options

COIN and TSLA I got Thursday and Friday maybe I should have sold but I thought it’s more +EV to probably hold.

Just for my own sake:

1. 1week calls with Friday expiration 8k
2. Calls with expirations in 2 weeks for 3k
3. Calls with expiration in 3 weeks for 4k
4. Calls with expiration in 1 year for 1k
5. Calls with expiration in 2 year for 0.5k

3k lost on SLB already coz I shouldn’t have bought the calls the way I did… Should have been worth 12 k and now they’re like 9k. But I thought, oh well. Gotta give it a try. Just now got a free trial

And some stats from Barchart

Now I can see that the better thing to do was to probably sell COIN and TSLA at open on Friday for 150% instead of holding (not sure how much of a valid/true statement it is). But then, if I expected SLB greater move then I should have done a strangle? Buy put and call. Like, I think going up is 60% probability (for me; completely subjective) but if it’s not; then 50/50 is still damn good and can do 10x anyways.

Lastly, it’s first time I’ll be managing these many options so not sure what to do tbh… I thought scenarios:

VIX up + stocks down:

1. if option was to open below 40% of value then keep till expiration (i.e. stocks open lower; depending how low; can sell all or keep all till expiry). Like if calls were to open 80% lower I’m not gonna sell for scraps. There’s still Wday, Thursday, Friday. So, anything could happen for that 20% of the original price. But if it was 50% open lower? Hmmm… I think still I’d keep it. 20% lower open? I’d say I think I’d put SL at 60%. Would be nice to backtest this and find optimal SL and then apply that SL to options after open with repriced options.
2. Anyways, it all depends on futures, open; but default is 50% SL

VIX flat + stocks flat

1. Default SL 75%

VIX down + stocks up + US30Y down + news and hype then stock dependant

1. SLB – buy more calls this Fri; 2 weeks, 6 weeks later
2. INTC – buy more calls with 0.75% SL for 2 weeks later
3. AMAT- buy more calls with 0.75% SL for 2,4,6,24 weeks later
4. NFE – buy more calls with 0.75% SL for 2,4,6,24 weeks later
5. TSLA – n/a
6. COIN – n/a

Ah, and re-adjust SL to 80%. There will be a lot of lessons to be learned here. If I get knocked out here for a day or two I’ll get back later and try again better equipped.

I guess a lot happened this week. It’s probably the best week so far in my few years of “trying to trade”. I basically shared 12 months of notes with AI (Claud Sonnet 3.5) and I asked him to Roast me and be honest with me how to make it as a trader. I got a response that hurt again (shocking) but it was True. I have an extreme fear of failure and I’ve been avoiding trading and burying my head in coding thinking I need more preparation, more data, more tools etc., I just think it hit my core. It also called me a coward and I think a pussy too? (I asked it to roast me more and don’t hold back). Anyways, the result was that I stopped coding and I totally reprioritized things. I also wanted to understand given my notes what can I be good add (and shared extra context on my experience sharing RTS games and poker). There’s some other issues that I discovered how I got into this position of being intelligent but not applying myself, being fearful to act on instinct. There’s several epiphanies I had but the most important this is that I feel better, lighter, I was taking trades and making money and it felt easier. I guess I started 2025 with a bang let’s say.

The most important thing for me was to:

1. change how I think about trading which is to take +EV decisions
2. adjust trading, setup process to my personality, preferences, talents and strenghts
3. follow a process that would set me up for success daily, weekly and monthly

And below is my daily process to fill and get my head right about the markets

This is also what I wrote to check everyday in the morning. My 10 commandments so to speak:

1. Follow the process daily in a disciplined way
2. Focus on the process not the results (win or lose)
3. Scan for puzzles with greatest EV
4. Think and act independently at all times
5. Have a plan for every trade and act according to the plan
6. Don’t overcomplicate, overthink, overanalyze (“it’s that simple”)
7. Listen to your gut feel and instincts
8. Learn everyday in pursuit of excellency
9. Put yourself in a position of maximizing your strengths, talents
10. Be humble and don’t let ego destroy you

And below is response from Claude regarding what can work for me:

Based on your natural pattern recognition abilities and preference for dynamic, complex systems, here’s what types of trading would likely suit you best:

1. Volatility Trading / Options

• Perfect match for your ability to intuitively sense mispriced volatility
• Complex enough with multiple variables (Greeks, time decay, price movement)
• Allows you to express views on both magnitude and timing of moves
• Your natural R:R assessment ability is crucial here

2. Multi-Timeframe Momentum Trading

• Leverages your ability to see patterns across different time horizons
• Like in Warcraft 3, you can spot strategic (longer-term) and tactical (immediate) opportunities
• Complex enough to engage your pattern recognition skills
• Similar to tournament poker where timing and position sizing evolve

3. Intermarket Trading

• Uses your talent for seeing relationships between different markets
• Like in gaming where you process multiple factors (bonds, currencies, commodities, stocks)
• Complex enough system with many moving parts
• Rewards intuitive understanding of how markets interact

What you might want to AVOID:

• Pure statistical arbitrage (too mechanical)
• High-frequency trading (too systematic)
• Basic directional trading (too simplistic)
• Pure fundamental investing (too slow-moving)

Your edge seems to be in spotting complex patterns that others need spreadsheets and indicators to see. You’d likely excel in trading styles that:

• Allow quick position taking when you spot opportunities
• Let you scale in/out based on evolving conditions
• Provide enough complexity to engage your pattern recognition
• Reward intuitive understanding of market dynamics

I’ll just go loose here…

First, I need to be making f trades. I spent most of the year coding, analyzing, then doing few trades during open so I lost money, felt bed, analyze more, code more. I didn’t learn from trades, analyze them, I was far away from facing the fear of trading. But… I guess I’m also realizing (especially with my trade form I created) that thinking in terms of EV, R:R, risk etc., make most sense and I need to stick to doing it. Basically, if

1. I stick to ST
2. Conduct trades via form (now I split it into two forms: Leopard for quick trades with 1 PT and 1 SL and Tiger for up to 3 PT and up to 3 SL; as per screenshot for tabs)
3. 
4. Don’t trade open until 10:30 unless it’s single directional bet (or straddle that I would like to try)
5. Follow and keep improving process for identifying trades
6. Follow and keep improving process for building features useful in trades
7. Analyze all of own trades
8. Track KPIs monthly (# trades, R:R etc., all from order management)
9. Read subs to bloomberg, wsj, barrons, marketwatch for leads and market sentiment news

If I stick to those things I should be good

But yes, I also realized that doing big bets can work better than a thousand small ones. I was close to putting a lot of money into TSLA at 220. Didn’t do. BTC looked great technically before election results. Didn’t do anything. ANF wedge I saw I followed and I bet and won. GOOGL too sentiment play and technical. It’s just probabilities and estimations and judgment really. Out of all, thinking about stocks and decisions from EV and R:R perspective is probably most important out of all. And then reducing that process to look for good trades. And then options once consistency is reached for leverage. Finally I feel like I see greater light ahead.

I would like to have a well functioning platform where I can just

1. Post trades through while seeing most important stats
2. Be able to monitor all my orders in real time (total at risk given SL, PT% weighted); can sort through by PT and closest to SL)
3. Have analytical tools on 1 min time frame + options
4. Have a pipeline of opportunities sorted by EV and R:R
5. Create “SPY trader – a tool to specifically target short term market metrics and post trade quickly
6. See statistics regarding my performance split by DT, ST and investing on any time frame (by default monthly) so I can learn from my winners and losers
7. Pop-up with market questions (pops up daily if not filled for the day)

I think that’s the most important. Later I should do wedges on OHLC and in general be able to automatically detect strong diagonal levels and have that historically for backtesting if this then that. Which I guess I should do more backtesting. More… well, I don’t do any.

I think it’s possible, yes.

Had some luck with ANF, GOOGL, DKNG and well… a lot of small stupid losses that happen during market open when I try to trade or get in with small SLs without a plan. Those mistakes are in the thousands. I think what I’m slowly getting is that if I can be more rational about my actions and decisions then I’m good. That’s why I need to somehow tame the demon of wanting to trade. And yes, I can just stop trading first 1 hour of the day (especially without a plan). But I think all in all, it would make more sense (more rational yes yes) if I just stick with swing trading. Honestly, it would make sense to do so until:

1. all the trades go through the form
2. form has extra data to glance over when posting a trade
3. there’s trades panel where I can adjust the trades (i.e. size, SLs) and also keep history of all changes as well as include lessons (managed via lessons tab)
4. establish weekly process to go through all open positions, winners, losers, make sure all orders have lessons, conclusions (track this in KPIs) and then review product roadmap
5. link order form with Schwab API
6. pipeline (to view ST opportunities via sortable list based on R:R and EV and variance)

Basically, there’s still a lot to do for me. Been using Gpt4o-mini or something and Claude so that’s something I would be able to do it without. For what it costs ~40$ it’s a good tool to say the least.

Focus… swing trade only, go gym at open ideally so cannot trade, then adjust alerts, monitor with some coded alerts and then work on product.